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December 2021 – Page 2 – The Prospector
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Advice Archive

First Loves

I once read a quote from a Buddhist: “If you meet somebody and your heart pounds, your hands shake, your knees go weak, that’s not the one. When you meet your soulmate you’ll feel calm.” It just stuck with me. Every time I’ve been in a relationship, I’ve felt subconsciously aware of if she makes me feel calm or panicked. Sometimes I end relationships because I feel too nervous and anxious around them, and sometimes that’s the right thing to do for you. 

I want to feel calm around someone. I want to not be in constant fear of judgment. I want someone who accepts me for who I am. Someone who makes me want to be a better person not because of who I am. I don’t want to feel like I should stay the same, I want to grow within the relationship because they inspire me to do better, to be better. To coexist alongside them. I want someone who feels like home. I want to emerge stronger out of every conflict. I want my love to be greater than my pride. To me, this is love and while I never have experienced it I look forward to it. To my first love.

Your first love is not necessarily your first boyfriend or girlfriend, It’s the first person for which you do things you never would have imagined doing. The person who makes you feel things you never even knew existed. First loves are the people who first introduce you to love. Not love for your mother or sibling love, but love with your lover. It’s the first person you let yourself be vulnerable with. In my opinion, this type of love is the most complicated one of all, since it’s the person you could possibly spend your entire life with. It’s the person who you have to accept both the good and the bad.

First loves are very significant in your love life and in general, since they’re your first love and you don’t have much experience with love in the beginning. They influence your standards a lot. They help you find what your type is. Your first love will always be a huge part of your life, no matter whether they’re still with you or not. They help you find out who you really are, your love language, your goals in all aspects whether it’s love-related or just in general. 

People usually confuse their first partner with their first love, which is not often true since “first love” implies that you actually love that person. People mistake love with caring, mostly the younger crowd because of lack of experience and maturity

I think first loves can be a hit or miss. You either have a good image of them or not. You either end your relationship on good or bad terms. I think there’s always still room to learn and grow about the relationship. 

For people who are dealing with a break up with their first love — I know it would be painful.  When I deal with a breakup I try to put myself in both perspectives. Try to have an honest conversation after the break up. Acknowledge what you did wrong and try to improve on what you lacked. It can help give you some closure. Personally, I try an unbiased approach. But if exes don’t want to have an honest conversation, it can slow character development. 

Sometimes I still have moments where I blame myself for things I never did. I ask myself if I was good to them, even though I know very well that I gave them my all. 

This is The Prospector’s first installment of “Advice from Alan.” We will be publishing a series of love advice articles written by our staff writer Alan Bautista. 

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Principal Egan Sees Need for Student Support after Sexual Assault Allegations, Instagram Page

By Eleanor Love, News and Sports Editor; Izzie Kim, Editor-in-Chief

McClatchy students, families, and officials experienced distress after an anonymous Instagram page by the handle of “@ckm_confessions_” shared crude posts about students and staff. Among these “confessions” were a number of sexual assault allegations. 

Principal Andrea Egan was first made aware of the confessions page on Friday, December 3, after a student brought it to her attention. While she described the page as initially worrying, it did not have many followers at the time. 

But her concern quickly grew. “I started seeing students’ names being talked about over and over. To call out somebody for how they look — it just was lots of really hurtful things. There were things mentioned about staff, and so over the weekend I got alarmed,” Egan said. 

Egan began messaging the account directly asking the owner to take it down, and they shared some back-and-forth exchanges. The owner of the account expressed that they thought the account was mostly harmless and funny, but they also told Egan that she should be concerned about some of the assault allegations that were being brought up. 

“It was all harmful and none of it should have been posted publicly,” she said. 

The page remained active and shortly after, went private. On December 6, Egan called Sacramento City Unified School District’s safety office asking for advice. The district reached out to law enforcement to see if there was anything that could be done, but since there was no imminent threat, they couldn’t act. 

Later, Egan directly called the Sacramento Police Department, who took a report. The police took the account seriously and took information about the account as well as some anecdotal information from Egan. They followed up with what they could. 

Egan and authorities have determined who was behind the page, which is now deactivated. 

She explained that she was unable to share too much about the student or their punishment, but did share that “we’ve met with the student and family and we are pursuing a consequence.” 

To clarify, the student behind the confessions page and the student behind the school shooting threat that occured on Friday, December 10 are not the same person. 

After a number of sexual assault allegations appeared on the confessions page, McKenna Silliman, a sophomore, created a separately-posted sexual assault reporting form for victims. She consented to being named, and was unaffiliated with the confessions page. 

“This is where I think there’s been a lot of misunderstanding,” said Egan. 

On the morning of December 7, Egan saw a post on the confessions account telling students to submit sexual assault reports to Silliman’s form. Egan called Silliman into her office under the assumption that she was working with the confessions page. 

“My fear was that if anything sensitive got reported by a student, that could end up on this confession page. I was very very concerned that if anyone shared something harmful, it could get publicly put out there before we had any knowledge of it or ability to help the student or the victim,” Egan said. Egan asked Silliman to take the form down, and she complied. This greatly frustrated many students.

“There was this perception that I was not interested in those worries, not taking them seriously, which of course I would absolutely never do. Anything that gets brought to us is one-hundred percent thoroughly explored,” Egan explained. 

Egan later met with Silliman and her mom, where she better understood Silliman’s intentions. Since then, Egan has met with numerous students, a student group, and has talked to parents who are interested in helping further conversations about sexual assault and safe spaces. Egan believes that there will be a student forum where she plans on presenting information about Title IX (how sexual assault reporting is handled) in the district. She also hopes to hear from students on how McClatchy can improve reporting procedures, student support, and mental health follow-ups.

“It’s very clear to me that students want to be heard, and I need to provide that space,” Egan said. 

McClatchy currently has partnerships with a number of mental health and sexual assault resources, like WEAVE, which provides sexual assault recovery services to Sacramentans. The challenge is operationalizing resources so students receive their services.

When asked if McClatchy has a sexual assault problem, Egan said “I honestly think students perceive there is, and so I need to take that seriously. I don’t know what’s going on behind all closed doors, but if that’s the feeling that students have, then I need to hear that.”

Egan explained that the past week has revealed to her the hardship that the pandemic has caused students. Emerging from nearly two years of social isolation has been difficult for kids.

“I think that students are really struggling emotionally. They’re walking around our building carrying stress. I knew that, educators all know that, but I think it’s really been laid bare this week how much support students need. Now it’s really my serious charge to dig in and figure out how we can put mental health first to focus on students feeling safe and comfortable with themselves in their school environment,” she said. 

Egan sent out a Roar announcement Sunday evening further outlining what she hopes to see change at school. “Please know these issues are at the forefront of my mind, and I plan to provide additional training for teachers and staff to better meet these needs and incorporate specialized programming for students we can identify who may be most at risk.”

In the Roar she also included a slide deck on Title IX reporting from SCUSD, which can be accessed here. For students who may be struggling with sexual assault, harassment, or mental health, inform a trusted adult, and access mental health services here

The Prospector reported on last week’s student-led meeting about sexual assault. Read it here

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Principal Egan Responds to School Shooting Threat Aftermath

By Eleanor Love, News and Sports Editor; Izzie Kim, Editor-in-Chief

Law enforcement and school officials have identified the McClatchy student who made school shooting threats in an Instagram post last Friday, December 10. 

“That student’s going to be held accountable. I can’t share with you what the discipline outcome will be, but it’s a serious thing. It caused severe disruption to the school day and a lot of fear among students and parents completely unnecessarily, so it’s a pretty serious offense,” said Principal Andrea Egan. 

On Friday, Assistant Principal Pedro Garibay was first notified of the shooting threat when a student reported it to him. He quickly informed Egan, who called district safety officials and law enforcement. 

McClatchy was placed under a “soft lockdown” during second period, and students were not to leave for third period. Egan contacted students’ families and made an announcement over the loudspeaker to explain the situation. But police quickly determined that the threat was not legitimate, and the lockdown was lifted by fourth period.

Egan explained that with the help of law enforcement, she and other officials were able to trace the post to a couple of people, call them in to interview them, and get to the bottom of the situation. 

“The police ensured us that there’s nothing behind it. The case is closed as far as I’m aware,” she said. 

When asked if she had a message to share with students and families in regards to school safety, Egan explained that “As a school leader, I think about those kinds of things every day. It’s ultimately my job to make sure that the school has systems in place to keep you safe. When something like this happens, you can’t just pull out the guide book, you have to be ready to go. My message to families would be that I and the team are as ready as we can be for a potential dangerous situation on campus.” 

Egan also shared that she and all staff are trained to handle school shootings, and that they have an active shooter training approaching in January. 

The school shooting threat came after an already eventful week. Earlier, McClatchy students and officials faced great distress over the anonymous “@ckm_confessions_” account and sexual assault allegations. The shooting threat is not believed to be related. 

The Prospector also reported on Principal Egan’s response to the confessions page and sexual assault allegations. Read it here

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School Shooting Threat at McClatchy

By Izzie Kim, Editor-in-Chief; Eleanor Love, News and Sports Editor

On Friday December 10 around 9:50 a.m., a school shooting threat emerged at McClatchy. Principal Andrea Egan sent out an emergency message alerting students and families, explaining that a “vague Instagram threat” indicated a school shooting.

“At this time we have no reason to believe it is credible. That being said, we have law enforcement researching the post,” Egan explained.

Shortly after, a reporting crew from local news station FOX 40 arrived on site to cover the potential threat.

A little after 10 a.m., Egan made an announcement on the loudspeaker asking all teachers to close and lock their doors. She declared that McClatchy was going into a “soft lockdown” and was trying to avoid a full lockdown. Students were to stay in their second period class and were told to not move on to third period.

Many parents called in early dismissals for their students. The front desk made a list of all students allowed to leave and sent administration officials to collect students and walk them to the front of the school where parents were waiting outside.

Some parents and students became worried after parents’ calls were unanswered. Teacher Lori Jablonski explained to her class that “the lines are jammed with parents trying to call their students”. The front desk made clear on the loudspeaker that students were not to leave campus without an early dismissal, and that they didn’t want too many students walking in the halls at the same time.

Update: December 10 at 11:25 a.m.

At around 11:20 a.m., Principal Egan announced over the loudspeaker that the Sacramento Police Department did not believe the school shooting threat to be credible. Students are to move from their second period classrooms to their fourth period when the bell rings at 11:29 a.m.

Update: December 10 at 11:55 a.m.

Shortly after making the announcement over the loudspeaker, Egan sent out a follow up robo-call to families. “We are going to move through the rest of the day as normal. We understand this is unsettling,” she said.

A separate article has been published with Egan’s response to this threat. Read it here

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Discussions over Sexual Assault Handlings Continue in Student Meetings

By The Editorial Board

On Thursday afternoon, a group of students met at lunch to discuss the school’s handling of sexual assault cases made known through the “@ckm_confessions_” page and the follow-up Google Form posted by a student unaffiliated with the account. 

Students packed the room to contribute to the discussion. Junior Eva Hernandez initiated and led the conversation, explaining recent events to students. 

Hernandez expanded upon student intentions behind the walkout. Originally planned for December 10 at 11 a.m., students planned to walk to the front of the school and fill its entrance. The event aimed to serve as a safe space for students where they could share their stories. 

Hernandez asserted that McClatchy needed to be a safer environment. “People shouldn’t be scared to walk the halls or talk to teachers or go to class because of harassment,” she told the room. Hernandez called for improved sexual assault, boundary, and support training for teachers. 

Claims by meeting leaders asserted that Principal Egan required the student who created the sexual assault Google Form to delete it. This was vocalized as one of the main sources of students’ frustration.

Many students expressed their dissatisfaction that preventative measures to better educate students and staff are not in place and that the McClatchy administration has only taken action after the social media uproar.

Even so, Hernandez and other student leaders Keara Sardo and Maddy Flint made it clear that it was nobody’s intention to attack Egan.

“It’s not about Egan, we know Egan has done more than [our previous principal] ever did. We acknowledge that Egan is giving some effort, which is more than we have seen,” said Sardo. 

“The intention is to show solidarity. We hear you, we see you, and we believe you. We want to make fundamental administrative changes but we are trying to make this a safe space even if the administration never does anything,” Sardo explained to the room.

A representative of a group who met with Egan at lunch was also in attendance. In their meeting, they discussed varying opinions on the situation and ideas to make change. Egan proposed ideas like buying new cameras to catch inappropriate situations, sending out messages about the effects of sexual assault, and a potential rehabilitation program for assaulters. She promised to present these initiatives to the district. 

One student countered the potential rehabilitation program, arguing that it illustrated that sexual assault “is not just an Egan issue, it’s an issue districtwide. Suspension for sexual assault is just 5 days.”

Another student argued that change shouldn’t be focused on solving the aftereffects of sexual assault, but preventing the causes beforehand. “Programs should [aim] to prevent sexual assault. Everyone should learn about assault and the district needs to know what is going on with schools”. 

Still, some students believed that even the “district would be lackluster in solutions.” They thought that “actions should be localized. It shouldn’t go 10 steps up the ladder before anything is done,” one student said.

“The walkout is a great way to accomplish change,” said Hernandez. But she and other meeting attendees decided to postpone the walkout to better organize their plan. It will no longer happen on Friday. 

The session ended abruptly, but meeting leaders stated that the conversation wasn’t over. Discussions about sexual assault and action at McClatchy will likely continue at a meeting next week.

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Distress at McClatchy Over Sexual Assault Allegations, Instagram Page

By the Editorial Board

Multiple McClatchy student groups are planning a walkout at 11:00 AM on Friday, December 10th in protest of the administration’s response to anonymously-shared sexual assault allegations.

The allegations were originally featured on an Instagram page, called “ckm_confessions_” which quickly grew popular. The account gained over one thousand followers in less than a week. 

Followers could submit a “confession” to the Instagram page via a Google Form in the page’s bio. Hundreds of confessions were submitted to the form — many that were posted included accusatory and lewd messages about other students and staff members. 

In addition, multiple anonymous confessions shared stories of sexual assault experienced by students. Some asserted that the school and administration had mishandled or ignored sexual assault cases.

As a response to these allegations, a McClatchy student unaffiliated with the page created her own Google Form where student sexual assault victims could further share their experiences. 

On Tuesday evening, Principal Andrea Egan sent out an emergency Roar announcement informing parents about the confessions page and urging students to stop contributing. Egan stated that legal officials had been contacted, declaring that “We are now working with SCUSD Technology Services and have reported the account to the Sacramento Police Department.“

Over the school intercom on Wednesday morning, Egan made an announcement with a similar sentiment. She described the confessions page as “hurtful, mean-spirited, and untrue,” and encouraged students to share any experiences involving bullying, sexual harassment, or unwanted attention to trusted staff at school. Egan added that McClatchy would continue to look into the allegations. 

Update: December 8, 2021 at 8 p.m.

On Wednesday evening, Egan sent out an additional Roar message to students and families. In the announcement, she recognized that sexual assault has been “a piece of the dialogue” of the recent events. 

Egan shared that she had met with the student who created the form for sexual assault victims and that they would be collaborating to create a safe space for students to be heard. Egan plans on meeting with other students tomorrow to discuss a potential student forum, which she was “excited to hear about.”

Other student groups plan to meet independently in order to discuss the events that have taken place this past week, specifically the administration’s responses.

“With all sincerity, I welcome all students to come to me with their problems, complaints, and possible solutions. It’s my job to work to make this a safe place to learn and meet your full potential,” Egan stated.

Today’s Roar update focused on the sexual assault reporting form created by a student unaffiliated with @ckm_confessions_ and not the account itself. As of now, the confession page seems to be deactivated with a “user not found” message popping up on its profile. 

A separate article with Principal Egan’s response has been published. Read it here