On September 7th, 2018, Mac Miller sadly passed away from an apparent drug overdose. He was only 26 years old. The day before he died, he released a tour schedule and not long before that, a full album. The death of Miller was unexpected by everyone, whether close to him or not.
Speculation surrounding the overdose, whether accidental or intentional, has been swirling around social media. A handful of people have taken it upon themselves to make this about his latest ex-girlfriend, Ariana Grande, and how she broke up with him not too long ago. Putting the blame on her, a few of them have gone out of their way with threats. One even went so far as to stand outside her house with knives. There is an unconfirmed report that Grande was hospitalized due to an anxiety attack following the death and the sequential harassment.
People are blaming her for his death because she broke up with him and moved on rather quickly. People are claiming she was not there for him when he was struggling to beat his drug addictions.
Ariana knows herself and what is good for her, she even said for herself that it was difficult helping him with his addiction but was still there for him after the breakup. Although they were not dating, it is clear that she was still a friend to him.
Women leaving a toxic relationship typically causes uproar, as if doing what is best for you is something so wrong. She stayed by his side as his girlfriend for years and couldn’t bare to be his “savior” much longer, his addiction obviously not getting any better as she struggled to help him.
This narrative that women should feel like a failure because they were unable to “fix” their significant other, that she should feel responsible for what he decides to do is incredibly misogynistic. Mac Miller should be the only one that is held accountable for the self-destructive behavior: he had an addiction, not his ex-girlfriend. His mental health should not be something that any woman should “fix.” It should be his responsibility to do what is best for him to be healthy. He was a grown man, after all.
Men’s actions when women are involved are always going to go back to the woman taking the blame for him. A man could touch a woman and the woman would be blamed for wearing revealing clothing. A man could kill himself and his girlfriend (or ex-girlfriend in this case) would be blamed for not taking good care of him. The list goes on for men’s actions that women always end up getting blamed for and it’s horrible. Women should not have to conform to what is acceptable so that men will stop behaving badly. Women should not have to have the responsibility of taking care of a man because they are in a relationship.
Things have definitely gotten better with this narrative but there is room to progress. A short black dress shouldn’t scream touch me anymore. A woman deciding to do what is healthy for her and breaking off a relationship with someone who clearly needed to help himself first before loving someone else shouldn’t be put to blame if he can’t help himself much longer. These pathetic excuses for things that men do need to stop; placing blame on the woman connected to the situation has to stop. Men should start being held accountable for their actions instead of the women in their lives.