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“Smoove” Interview with Jonah Lavering

Of all the great athletes at McClatchy High School, none are surrounded by as much intrigue as is Jonah Lavering (‘18). By day, he’s a 3-point specialist on the boys basketball team. By night, he roams Sacramento streets in his 2000 Honda Accord, one hand on the wheel, blasting ‘90s hip-hop and frequenting McDonald’s drive-thrus, picking up friends and dropping them off again, escaping the oppression of daily routine through pursuit of life’s raw thrills; a restless spirit adrift on a sea of adventure. He is also famously soft spoken. After many requests, however, Mr. Lavering agreed to an exclusive interview with the Prospector. Below are the musings of the smoothest man in the world.
Q: You’re widely known as “J-Smoove” — when was it that you became so smooth?
A: Seventh grade.
Q: What happened in seventh grade?
A: They just started calling me that.
Q: But when did you get so smooth?
A: Uh … Seventh grade.
Q: Alright. But what is it about you that makes you so smooth?
A: That’s a good question.
Q: Is it the hair?
A: Nah, it’s everything.
Q: Do you like elbows better than knees, or knees better than elbows?
A: Knees.
Q: Do you ever get nervous?
A: Yeah.
Q: When?
A: I don’t know.
Q: What is your favorite dance move?
A: I don’t have one.
Q: If you had to choose between the whip, the nae-nae, and the dab, which would you choose?
A: The nae-nae.
Q: Are you ticklish?
A: Yeah.
Q: How has your car changed your life?
A: It gave me freedom.
Q: You’re fighting for your life – what’s your weapon of choice?
A: A gun.
Q: Who is your hero?
A: Peter Griffin.
Q: How do you feel about true love?
A: I’m gonna get it.